La Liga Whispers: Has Guti been told where to shove his career?

Guti could be on his bike to Inter Milan during winter transfer window after giving ex-teammate Wesley Sneijder a call. I wonder if he asked how Mourinho reacts when you tell him to shove his tactics up his rear end.

The joke's on Real Madrid after Andrés Iniesta revealed Barcelona decided to take their cup tie seriously at half time. Next year Madrid will demand to have their match first.

Raul says adaptation to new manager and tactics is taking too long. Fans say Raul's retirement is taking too long. Touchee.

Pelligrini mistakenly thought Sergio Ramos was suspended for yesterdays cup tie, leading to his omission from the team. He claims had Ramos played, Real Madrid would have won 8-0.

Osasuna defender Oier Sanjurjo is confirmed to be suffering from swine flu. Cancel football...NOW.

Tottenhams Pavlyuchenko has been linked with Valencia but claims a move to Spain could be bad for his pale white skin. Siberia, Iceland and Greenland are among his desired destinations.

Zaragoza coach Marcelino fell out with Málagas groundsman after blaming his sides cup defeat on the state of the pitch. Not enough blades per square inch.