According to the boffins, if I was to have any chance of pulling the laydeees into my shag pad for the long term, I need to look less the mouthwateringly irresistible dripping-in-manjuice hunk I am now.
To help all men out there be in touch with their feminine side, I've graciously prepared a series of beautification seminars....
Libre registration fee. Alam nyo naman ang turo sa akin ni Mother Ricky, help da less fortunate kaya siksik, liglig, umaapaw ang aking kawang-gawa para sa masa. Ika nga ni Lola Imelda, ok lang na poor and inang bayan, basta and mga citizens ay beautiful.
Aaaanyways, look who's back in our beloved Pelepens. Our favourite Amadejinad impersonator...
Come, habibi, have a look at my carpets.
Yilmaaaaaz. Our peborit sugar daddy. Hopefully he will take some time out of his busy schedule to donate some of that body hair to patients who have undergone chemotherapy. (Matanong ko nga ang mga gerls, ano ang appeal ng balbas-sarado? Hindi pa parang ini-Scotch Brite nyo pekpek nyo pag sya ang nambrobrocha?)
Panawagan:
Rooopa, ples lang makeneg ka kay Teta Anabel, hwag mo na balikan si Yilmaz. Magtatayo kasi ako ng Persian restaurant sa Baguio. Kelangan ko ng taga-gawa ng Shawarma at pwidi sya para mas authentic.